Dealing With Emotional Wounds And Inner Vows

Date: 04 July 2008
Speaker: Sister Evangeline
Venue: My House

Every adult was once a child and that fact has an important bearing on our lives till today. Deep within our souls, we all carry our 'inner child of the past'. This is a set of feelings and attitudes brought from our childhood, which causes us to see things with a double vision. Rational (adult) yet emotional (child).

Subconsciously, your emotional programming is responsible for 1) Your value system concerning love and relationship 2) The awkwardness you may have in relating to people 3) The way you express love to others, especially your husband or wife 4) The way you 'protect' yourself whenever you sense you are getting hurt or disappointed.

Reasons why we repeat the toxic attitudes of our parents:

1) Learnt behaviours

2) Bitterroot judgement (a seed of deep resentment that has grown into a full-blown character flaw in your life, making you do the very thing you detest in an offender)

Hebrews 12:14-15
Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled;

Luke 6:37
“Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

3) Emotional wounds from childhood (sexual trauma, physical or verbal abuse, parental absence, parents who are emotionally shutdown, control and manipulation)

4) Inner vows (a pre-determination set by the mind and the heart in your childhood that will subconsciously direct your whole adult life)

Matthew 5:34
But I say to you, do not swear at all: neither by heaven, for it is God’s throne;

How do you deal with these deadfalls?

1) Confess that you have a problem.

1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

2) Forgive those who have hurt you, especially your parents.

Matthew 6:15
But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

3) Ask God to forgive you for harbouring resentment, bitterness and judgement toward people, yourself and perhaps even God himself.

Mark 11:25-26
“And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

4) Release all your hurt to our Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Peter 5:7
casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.

5) Receive healing from Jesus.

Luke 4:18
“ The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;

6) Reconcile wherever possible.

Matthew 5:23-24
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.

James 5:16
Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

7) Make restitution wherever possible.

Luke 19:8
Then Zacchaeus stood and said to the Lord, “Look, Lord, I give half of my goods to the poor; and if I have taken anything from anyone by false accusation, I restore fourfold.”

Ephesians 4:28
Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need.